Day Thirty: The Status Change

I’ve changed my status back to single. I couldn’t bear it any longer. Seeing my status with his name will always remind me that it’s not the shukri I want it to be. And I won’t deny that people are starting to respond to that change.
Things were good. Talked with few people I’ve seen around. I got to admit, I wouldn’t have talked to any of them if I’ve never met you. You gave me courage, you changed me into being someone just like you. And I loved you for that.
Someone asked me a question, so simple yet I couldn’t answer: What do I look for in a boyfriend or date?
The only thing that came into my mind was you. You were everything I ever wanted for a boyfriend. My definition of perfect changed when I met you. We were good together shuk. Why must you ruin me? What does drugs got to offer that I can’t??
I was good to you. I gave my all for you. Kept no secrets, loved you like I never did, even promised you and myself that I will never hurt you. People could see I’ve changed since I met you. And I smiled everytime, because I know it’s true.
Someone saw me sitting alone looking lonely, and asked my colleague if I had a fight with you. It’s almost been a month, yet he didn’t know.
Even though I’m tearing as I’m typing this, I won’t let myself say another ‘I love you still’ again.

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